I'm back, and I need help

I wish I had some awesome story to tell you about why I haven't blogged in two weeks. Like, I won a radio call-in contest and was on a cruise in the Caribbean. Or I was kidnapped and forced to watch all six seasons of Lost before they let me come home.

But no, it was a self-imposed blogging/writing/reading fast. Here's how I spent my time instead: carpentry work (I promised my husband we'd do it when we got back from conference); cleaning, sorting and organizing for our upcoming party weekend (more on that later); dispensing medicine for sick kids (Olivia got the flu); and okay, I'll admit, I wasted a few hours watching shows on Hulu, but we were really tired from all our remodeling, so I think we deserved it. 

We're working to get stuff done on our house because of a few "flexible" deadlines from the bank. Plus, we're having tons of family in town to celebrate Caroline and Olivia's birthdays, and we want to impress them.  :) It shouldn't be hard--they've seen this place without walls. 

So, anyway, the party. It's going to be awesome, just ask my kids. They thought up the theme, which is mythological creatures. Yes, you read that right. My baby is turning one year old and we're going to dress her as a garden gnome. hehe Owen is going to be a cyclops. Olivia's a Leprachaun. I think Aaron is going to be Zeus? But here's where you come in, dear friends. I have no idea what I should be. Somebody suggested a flower fairy, but how boring is that? They all get to be really cool things. (Insert whining.) Olivia suggested a Werewolf, but I don't think I could get the facial hair right on such short notice. Plus, aren't they bad guys? I don't want to be a villain at my daughter's first birthday party (unless it's a really, really ultra-cool villain.) So guys, what do you think I should be? Tell me quick, the party's in four days and I still have to make the Toadstool cake.

CUPCAKES AND ADDICTIVE SUBSTANCES (conference, pt2)

Pre-conference bonus: The Big Fat Cupcake. The question of the ages: can you buy happiness? Maybe not, but you can certainly eat it.

Conference Highlights:

So many to choose from! But here goes.

- Jenness! (can a person be a highlight?) She had been asked to give the devotional on Saturday morning and she was so nervous. But it was amazing. She was amazing. God is amazing! (Seriously. She made me cry.) Plus, she curled my hair (and Betsy's) for the banquet. And she was willing to try carrying me down the hall. (At least I think that's what we were doing in this pic. It was the last day and we were really tired. I promise, it really was just coffee in the cup.)

-Dinner with my agent and his other clients. He has so much experience in Christian publishing, and such an obvious passion for the gospel that it is completely humbling.

-New friends: shout out to Liz and Andrew. Liz, I'm reading your book now! :) Andrew, the moment when you pitched your book to us at the table and said, "No really, it is a Christian book!" will live as one of the funniest conference moments ever. I expect to be reading your book before long. :)

-Getting fired up to go home and write with some fabulous classes. Susan May Warren and Rachel Hauck are fantastic. Best advice of the week: Try harder. Don't settle for "decent". 

-Lunch with all my friends and a really cool editor. You all know who you are.

-Commiserating, brainstorming, praying, laughing. I got spoiled spending so much time with one of my best friends. I miss you already, Betsy!

Going home: Isn't it funny how the drive home always seems shorter?

I was exhausted, delirious, and a bit overloaded so that always helps. ;)

Need proof? I tried to "reduce redeye" in this picture, but then you could tell that my eyes were completely bloodshot. Apparently, I do need sleep.

The highlight of the trip home would be obvious to anyone who is a parent: picking up my kids. This was the first time Caroline had stayed away from us at night and it was for five days. She did better than I did. But the look on her face when she saw me... it wasn't the big smile I was hoping for. It was better than that. She just stared at me, wide-eyed with the focused intensity she gets when she's chugging a bottle. She couldn't stop looking at me and I couldn't stop looking at her. Then she smiled, slowly and with her whole body.  

That's the kind of memory you keep forever. 

ROAD TRIP (conference, pt 1)

Tune your mental soundtrack to the following:

Carry On Wayward Son- Kansas (must listen to Kansas when driving through it)

How Bizarre- OMC (Because... is there really an acceptable reason?)

Time On Your Side- Emily Jane White (Because it talks about truckers and wasted lives and frank sinatra, and because it's beautiful and one of my characters heard it on the radio the other day and it made her feel lonely)

Selected Waterdeep (like "Everybody's Guilty", the one Lori sings instead of Don on the live cd.)

Get your snacks:

Side Note: I adore the Flint Hills of Kansas. At first all you see is a rolling blue-green horizon. Look closer. The prairie grasses are purple and golden and green and orange and... you get the idea. Hopefully, knowing my love for Kansas will offset the impact of the disparaging remarks I am about to make about Western Kansas.

It is flat. I took no pictures. I didn't need to.

(Although I should have captured the signs advertising the giant 8,000 pound prairie dog and the "live" 5-legged steer. I missed the boat on that one.)

We were so exhausted from having nothing to look at (and, I'll admit, from singing really loudly to Wayward Son) that we had to detour in Hays, KS to find a restaurant we'd read about in a magazine. I had some kind of green bean dumpling soup that I would highly recommend, should you ever find yourself detouring in Hays, KS.

And, can I just ask, what is the deal with Limon, Colorado? We started seeing signs for it over 200 miles out, and we'd drive and drive and take stupid pictures of our snack food and the signs would tell us we'd only gotten like 20 miles closer to it. 

We arrived in Denver after 11 grueling hours (okay, so we did stop in Goodland--accidentally--to see the Giant VanGogh. I must say, I was a bit disappointed. If it were a Giant VanGogh painted by blind chimpanzees, now we're talking.)

So, Annie and Pete met us halfway up a mountain and drove us to Zoka's, a hidden gem with food so good I didn't even think to take a picture. Duck with berry reduction, venison tenderloin with a maple glaze, Wild game grilled sausage. And, yes, that was all for me.

Pete and Annie's front porch is THE place to be first thing in the morning. Make sure you have a cup of coffee steaming into your face when you sit on their pine porch swing under your blanket in the chill mountain air.  You'll watch the colors heat the morning, and you might have a moment. You know what I'm talking about.

Thank you, Pete and Annie, for making me jealous.

And for making me think about how big God is. About how he made all this, and yet he set his affection on me.

My verse for the conference--the one I read and couldn't stop thinking about-- was from Psalm 17. The chapter talks about evil men, about begging God for deliverance. I was trying to figure out how this would apply to my life, since I am not currently being chased by evil men, when I caught David's description of the wicked: "...men of the world, whose portion is in this life. You fill their womb with treasure, they are satisfied with children." (v.14) 

It's easy to go to a writing conference with "this life" solidly in view. But is that all that I have in view? Am I content to be satisfied with my children-- my books, my temporary future? I notice that God is the one giving the treasure, giving the children, and he doesn't give evil gifts. So the pitfall isn't with what I have, it's with what I want.

"As for me I shall behold your face in righteousness; when I awake, I shall be satisfied with your likeness." (v.15)

And when I wake up in the morning to this kind of glory, and I know that it is only a shadow, a dim reflection of the beauty of its Creator, my heart trembles. I was made to experience that kind of beauty? To wake up with that likeness someday? 

TO BE CONTINUED...

CUPCAKES and ADDICTIVE SUBSTANCES (conference, pt 2)

countdown

(Me, trying to take a last minute author pic in the backyard... with help.)

Last week in three parts of speech: 

frenetic: (adj.) characterized by feverish activity, confusion, and hurry.

success: (n.) the achievement of something planned or attempted.

anticipate: (v.) 1. to imagine or consider something before it happens and make any necessary preparations and changes. 2. to feel excited, hopeful or eager about something that is going to happen.

Next week in three parts of speech:

insomnia: (n.) inability to fall asleep or to remain asleep long enough to feel rested.

overwhelming: (adj.) having such a great affect as to be emotionally overpowering.

delight: (v.) to gain great enjoyment or pleasure from something.

Two days of crazy prep to go, and then we're off! The ACFW conference is here all of the sudden, ready or not! Please pray that I am able to finish up a few writing objectives before we head off. This past week has been really successful (as noted above). :) I was able to get several more chapters done as well as a one sheet- which is what you use to pitch your project to editors. Think the back cover of a book. 

Pray for me as I talk to people (editors, my agent, etc.) about the project. Really, I'm just getting feedback at this point because the book isn't completed. But I feel strongly that this is a book God is asking me to write. The past year has been spent away from writing with a CONSTANT struggle between the balance of writing ministry and ministry to my family and neighborhood. Whenever I wrote, I felt guilty that I was not working elsewhere, and whenever I didn't write, I felt like I was ignoring open doors. But mostly, I was just unconvinced that writing was the correct use of my time. The things I was writing about seemed unimportant to me and of little spiritual value, thus the guilt. 

With this book project (I'll tell you more about it later), that guilt has disappeared. Although I often feel insufficient for writing on this subject, I have no doubt that I'm supposed to do it. What God does with the finished product is for Him to decide. I just know this is something I have to write.

"The LORD is my chosen portion and my cup;
   you hold my lot.

 You make known to me the path of life;
   in your presence there is fullness of joy;
   at your right hand are pleasures forevermore."

-Psalm 16: 5, 11

What I Needed To Hear Today

Sing and Play

Happy Labor Day, everyone! We're busily working on house deadlines/writing deadlines (self-imposed!)/ school deadlines. Nothing like a little hard Labor to get things done.

And for those of you who like to whistle while you work: my new favorite. I actually DROVE to a store and bought it.  A real store. Not Amazon. (I know, right?)

Listen free here. 

My favorites: The Outsiders, Stones Under Rushing Water, Garden, Something Beautiful

O & O's favorite: Girl Named Tennesee (A dance party was held on the third floor in this song's honor. Owen's got some moves.)

What Do I Know of Holy?

I'm writing a story right now that deals with some pretty deep things. This song expresses exactly how I feel:

I made You promises a thousand times
I tried to hear from Heaven
But I talked the whole time
I think I made You too small
I never feared You at all No
If You touched my face would I know You?
Looked into my eyes could I behold You?

What do I know of You
Who spoke me into motion?
Where have I even stood
But the shore along Your ocean?
Are You fire? Are You fury?
Are You sacred? Are You beautiful?
What do I know? What do I know of Holy?

I guess I thought that I had figured You out
I knew all the stories and I learned to talk about
How You were mighty to save
Those were only empty words on a page
Then I caught a glimpse of who You might be
The slightest hint of You brought me down to my knees


Where have I even stood
But the shore along Your ocean?
Are You fire? Are You fury?
Are You sacred? Are You beautiful?
What do I know? What do I know of Holy?

(Addison Road, "What do I know of Holy?")

FA (Fabri-holics Anonymous)

Do you find yourself staring for indeterminate lengths of time at a particularly awesome swath of fabric? 

Have you considered selling something, say maybe your car, so that you can buy such fabric?

Have you ever considered even for a moment using fabric as wallpaper? 

Do certain fabrics make you to giggle out loud, causing those around you to suspect you are the slightest bit... how shall we say it... off center?

If you answered yes to any of the above questions you are in the right place.

I have just discovered my new favorite fabric designer, Art Gallery Fabrics by Patricia Bravo. (Check out her blog.) And, yes, I bought some:

The green on the right is actually by Joel Dewberry. It's going in the dining room window seat. The other three are Art Gallery awesomeness: pink for the bathroom curtains and some accent pillows in the family room. Teal for the inside of the laptop bag Alicia is making me. Gray/blue/green for the laundry room curtains.  Yes, I know. It's an illness. That's what the support group is for.